We See What We Want…

Isn’t that the truth.

I always wonder why we are blind-sided by love, or the idea of love? And when we think we are inLOVE, we only see the positives.

But since I’ve parted ways with my husband, I realize that all the years we were together,  I hardly  paid attention to the red-flags or maybe, I simply dismissed them. I could chalk it up to  youth and/or being inexperienced, but really it boils down to being insecure and maybe even just plain dumb.

Recently we got together for a talk. A talk he initiated, and I had no idea it was because he was aiming to get back together – that’s the kind of talk I am referring to. After spending a couple of hours with him – literally walking on egg shells because I was doing my best not to buckle and give in – something came over me and I managed to say NO to him – about him moving back in.

Because all I am able to see now is the sides to him that makes me feel jittery and not in a good way (if there is such a thing), and that I know that if I let him back into my life again…he would crush me in no time and that I am no longer willing to live with.

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